Bigger every day.

Well, Aubrey is growing up so much everyday. She seems to be losing the baby look now and is turning into a little girl. She is a beautiful little girl but I wish they could stay babies forever. I miss the snuggles time that we used to have but also love the partial snuggles I get now. I now get a kiss and a hug and an I wuv you momma. And then sometimes several more kisses ok....So it is great. I love it.
She had her first haircut last week. We had to trim her bangs since they were falling in her eyes, and in the back of her head she had just one strand of hair that was long while the rest of it is short..So we chopped that off too. I did cringe the whole time we were doing it. I waited so long for her hair to fill in that I didnt want to cut it.
So we have been going to therapy twice a week for her sensory processing issues. She seems to be adjusting to it very well. She has a great time going there and just getting to play for a while. She is doing some things that never could get her to do....Like nail clipping without fighting and brushing her teeth. In the past when given some cheese crackers with the cheese in the middle would only lick the cheese off and would not eat the cracker. But the other day she ate the crackers too. So there is some improvement. We are still having alot of issues with temper tantrums but we are working on that too.
Aubrey's speech is getting to be more and more advanced. She repeats so many things that we say and sometimes gets JD and I in trouble with the other one....by repeating something that we should not have said in the first place. Most of the time we can understand what she is saying...even her full sentences...But once in a while she will just go on with this huge run on sentence that we cannot understand a word she is saying, and then when done she will look at us like she is expecting a response. JD and I will just look at each other and shake our heads and ask the other if they got that. LOL....The funny part about it is she knows exactly what she is saying and gets mad when we do not respond.
The holidays are coming very soon. I love this time of year and get very excited about Christmas. But this last year Jd has had so many extra days off and now with the holidays coming he will be working more. We are so used to having him home more often that it might take a while to adjust to it. But we will.
To end the post with a couple of pictures.

How fast they Grow.

Aubrey turned two this week! It was a very exciting time for all of us. JD and I are both feeling a little sad that our little girl is growing up so fast. We took her to Chuck E Cheese on her birthday and we had a conversation in the car on the way home about how much fun she had. JD said to me " I think she will have alot more fun when she is older. But I don't want her to get older. I'm ok with her staying this age forever." How sweet. He sure loves this little girl.

She is growing so much everyday. She is always learning new things. It is amazing how much children hear even if you think they are not paying attention. HAHA. We will be talking about something when she is in the other room and she will come out and repeat something that we said. LOL. Of course we think that everything she does is cute even if it isnt! It is amazing how strong a persons love is for their child. I love her so much that it hurts sometimes.

We had Aubrey evaluated by early on because we were concerned about some issues we have been having with feeding, grooming, etc...I was getting to the point where it was getting so frustrating for her to act like it was hurting her so badly when I brushed her hair or anything else...I was starting to question myself as her mother. I was thinking that I am just a bad mother and that is why it was like this. My daughter does not trust me to even change her diaper. I was so down about it that I finally said I have to think this through. So I did. I thought about all the issues we were having, and also had some help from a very wise person, and I realized that it was a little more than my parenting or her trusting me. I called and got set up for an evaluation.

The evaluation shows that she is doing exceptionally well in most aspects of her developement. Her fine and gross motor skills are great and they were really impressed with her vocabulary. She does talk a ton! But based on the checklist that I completed and the things that I told them they found that she does have some tactile sensory issues. She is not 50% delayed in anything so she does not qualify for special education which therefore eliminates her from being able to work with the early on Occupational therapist. So we had to get a referral from her pediatrician.

When I took the report to her pediatrician she treated me like I was crazy. I had to fight with her to get a referral. After telling her that we will go days when all Aubrey eats is applesauce for two or three days in a row...she tells me that she finds that hard to believe because she is growing. With all the other issues she tell me that she is being a normal two year old. Nevermind the fact that she has a written report in front of her that confirms sensory problems. I actually had to bring the fact that I have a nephew with sensory integration disorder and I am seeing some of his behaviors in Aubrey up in order for her to believe me. I said that and she completely changed her tune. So in the end I did end up getting the referral.

I have been having other people tell me that I need to stop trying to make Aubrey have problems. She is a normal two year old. I need to stop worrying so much. I need to just do this and do that. How can a mother just stop worrying about her little girl? I do not know how to not worry. She is my world. If she gets hurt my heart shatters into a million pieces. I have also been told that I should just not talk to people about what is wrong with her because nobody is going to understand. I don't feel that this is anything to be ashamed of. Same as if she was born with a major disability.....I would have no reason to be ashamed of that. She is still my little girl and I love her just the same no matter what.

To be told that she does have sensory issues does not make me feel good. I know that she is going to have a rough go of it and it is going to be alot of hard work. But is ignoring the problem going to do any good for anyone? Yes it does make me feel a little better to know that it is not me. To know that it is not just that she does not trust me. I now know that she cannot tolerate these things physically and it is not that I am doing anything wrong. But I did want to hear from early on that she does NOT have any issues and she is a completely normal two year old. I know that this is not a severe diagnoses but there is still the reality that she is going to have more problems than any normal child. It breaks my heart to think about the fact that we are going to have to take her to therapy every week and that yes she could need extra help when she reaches school age. To know that something that I do everyday as a normal part of life such as hairbrushing is actually causing her pain. It is a terrible feeling.

It is interesting how you have an amazing support system and then when you find out that your child is not perfect you feel all alone. Your support system is all of a sudden no longer there. It is hard enough being a parent....but to be a parent of a special needs child and to be all alone with no support system. Don't get me wrong...I have a ton of support from our brother and sister in law but they are in a different state. They can be there for me somewhat but not the way they would like to be. JD is being wonderful about this as well....but while he is at work and I am at home with Aubrey working hard to make things better for her....who do I have?

Anyways, this started off as a post about Aubrey and turned into something else. I will have to post all about Aubrey later.

Not so much a baby anymore!

So it has been two weeks now since I have been home with Aubrey! I am loving it! I cant believe I even wanted to go back to work in the first place!
Aubrey is growing up so much! She is a bundle of energy all the time! She is learning words like crazy. Last night we were reading a book and she pointed to everything in the book and told me what it was. If anyone else was listening they would have asked "What did she say?" But since we hear her all the time we know exactly what she said. We also counted to six together. I said one then she said two, free, our, ive, six! It was very cute and I was very proud! Then when she was done I told her good job and she looked at me and said Good Job Momma! HAHA! What a cutie!
She now says thank you and your welcome. She will hand you something and tell you thank you! Then when I give her something she says welcome mama! So she has it a little backwards but hey she says it! The other night I was changing her diaper and she looked at me and said your mean! I was just totally shocked to hear her say that! I told her no Aubrey for me to change your diaper is a very nice thing to do. She looked at me and said Nice! What a goofball.
We are going to start working on potty training soon. She has decided that her favorite hangout place is by the toilet now so I think it might be time.
Sigh.....Talking, potty training, planning a two year birthday! My baby isnt such a baby anymore!

Summer Time

So for those who don't already know. I am home with Aubrey again due to being laid off from my job. Even though we are losing a nice chunk of money, I am excited about the summer that we have ahead of us. We are planning to spend a week down in Illinois with family in July, We are planning a trip to the Columbus zoo with my parents in August..Then of course we have family reunion and the fourth of July! It is going to be a great summer!

Yesterday JD and I took Aubrey to the beach. And her NANA came too! Aubrey was very excited about that! It was her first time going to the beach. There was a splash park. When she saw it she was all excited, she could not wait to get over there. We walked into it and she flipped out. She started yelling NO! NO! NO! and then proceded to cry. I picked her up and tried to carry her under some of the sprinklers and she cried even more. For a kid that loves baths and last summer loved to go swimming she sure doesnt like to get wet! What a goof ball!

So we stayed away from the splash park and just stuck with the beach. Her and NANA played in the sand, and mom played a little too. She had a blast playing in the sand untill of course she got some wet sand stuck to her hand. She held her hand up to me and said dirty! And then started crying. So now she does not like to be dirty either. But we cleaned the sand up and she went back to digging in the sand.

She did not want anything to do with the water at first. But we took her little tube out there and picked her up and put her in there and she had a blast after that. We actually had a hard time keeping her out of the water. HAHA. She actually a couple of times while we were eating dinner picked up her tube and said. GO! GO! and started walking towards the water. It was so adorable.

We all had a great time. It was a great way to spend such a hot day! Aubrey was beat when we left. She fell asleep in the car on the way home and even slept through getting out of the car taking her clothes and shoes off and gettting her diaper changed. What a cutie!

So there is the story of our great day at the beach and my first entry in this blog. I hope everyone enjoys it! Now to end the post with a couple pictures.